Thursday, January 31, 2013

Welcome To the Hall of Bad Dudes, Ron Jeremy

When I had the idea for The Hall of Bad Dudes yesterday it seemed obvious to me I was using the term "dudes" loosely,  and anyone from the beginning of human history, even dogs, chimpanzees, or inanimate objects were fair game for induction into The Hall of Bad Dudes. Even women could make it in. Then I wrote about Ray Lewis. I listen to sports radio and whatever is currently happening in the world of sports creates the background noise for my day. Some people constantly have a television or a radio on, I listen to the Boers and Bernstein Show on 670 the Score. So it was obvious I would write about Ray Lewis because aside from Ron Jeremy there just wasn't anything else being talked about. But here's the thing: I don't enjoy writing about sports or sports figures. Unlike many sports commentators, I don't consider sports a microcosm of human behavior. In fact, I feel exactly the opposite. I feel sports is often an isolated example of the human experience. I cringe when I hear writers refer to "the battlefield" and how they are "going to war," or how a sports contest or an athlete is healing a city or providing an example for anyone to follow. End of sermon on that. My point is I don't just want to create a rogues' gallery of sports figures who have behaved badly because at a certain point I find bashing sports figures as uninteresting as lifting them up for worship. 

The problem is when I write about sports people show up, as nearly a thousand readers did yesterday to read a blog that didn't even exist at the beginning of the day. But I'm not just going to bang on athletes. I like sports. I think there are elements in sport and especially team sport that do demonstrate some of the best that we are capable of as a species. Nor do i consider myself the judge and jury of who is and who is not a "good" person. I hope there will be an element of tongue- in- cheek going on as I induct others into this august assembly of scoundrels. That said, today's inductee into the Hall of Bad Dudes is...

Ron Jeremy
Before I proceed, I want to say I hope Ron Jeremy makes a full recovery and lives fifty more years, and I'm far from a prude, but there's one simple reason I'm inducting Ron Jeremy... wasted potential. Ron Jeremy is a likable and talented person, and I was surprised when I learned he had begun his adult life teaching special education children in New York. He was born to extremely intelligent parents, his father being a physicist and his mother was a book editor who spoke several languages. I watched the movie Porn Star and I was left with the impression that he wasn't an entirely happy person. My evaluation is less about character than the possibility that he wasted a great many years of his life performing in adult movies when he could have been doing something a little more meaningful. He seems perfectly capable of it. 

Keep in mind this is The Hall of Bad Dudes, not the Hall of Evil Dudes. And there's a lot of iconoclastic worship of Ron Jeremy from people who probably envy what he does, but I'm not sure anything Ron Jeremy has done since the moment he walked out of a classroom has been all that noble, meaningful, or worthy of respect. And to me that seems like a shame because this is clearly a person with the talent to have have earned that respect in a lot of different ways. 

So, Ron Jeremy, get well soon, and welcome to The Hall of Bad Dudes.

previous inductees Ray Lewis

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

The Hall of Bad Dudes: Ray Lewis

Ray Lewis is our first inductee into The Hall of Bad Dudes. I have come to despise this man these past few weeks, whereas I previously just hated him. I didn't follow the murder trial he was involved in twelve years ago because I just was too busy with my own bad- assery to follow football back then. The evidence seems to indicate he either aides, abetted, or directly participated in a double murder and the covering up of the act.   he did plead out to an obstruction of justice charge and paid off the victim's families in a civil settlement, both things most people not guilty of a crime don't do, but none of that is really why I hate Ray Lewis. I hate him because of the people who love him. 

If I knew nothing about Ray Lewis this picture alone would be sufficient to gain him entry into The Hall of Bad Dudes. Religion is the last refuge of scoundrels. I buy his devoutness about as much as I buy his testimony in the murder trial. Fate has a way of tracking down these bad dudes. It will find Ray Lewis. This week is the apex of his football career. Even though some people are asking questions about his character and wondering why he's receiving so much worship most of America is willing to buy the popular narrative and jump the bandwagon of uncritical hero worship. But this week will end and a new one will begin. And as often happens, the public will slowly forget about Ray Lewis. But out there somewhere is another bad dude. A dude even badder than Ray Lewis. I think one day Ray Lewis will run into that bad dude.

Welcome to the Hall of Bad Dudes, Ray Lewis.

Want to suggest a bad dude?